Where did the time go?
After being accused of increasing global warming using some very spurious logic involving having to log in and check this blog, only to find no new news, I decided I ought to add some more and looking back January was my last entry, hence "where did the time go????"
We now have settled nicely in to our new home, it really is a very comfortable house, so much so that we are trying to figure out that if and when we return to the UK (still when rather than if) how can we build this home there? The answer generally involves around acres and cash, but it would be great to do so, it is roomy, very very roomy, it's nothing exceptional from an American perspective, but we can banish children to the other end of the house and they can be killing each other, we can't hear it. Very bad parenting, very relaxed household.
At last the darling children have found some friends and play outside instead of being glued to game consoles and laptops. We purchased the laptop to keep Lorraine and the kids in touch with friends and family in the UK. If the kids get a go they argue about whose turn it is to on Penguin Club (no idea before you ask), however, this is unusual as Lorraine has now mastered the Facebook/Skype applications and is more in touch with UK friends and family even more than when we were at home.
It is quite interesting, and very much how it should be, that kids here seem to remain kids much longer. Sarah has found a friend that is around 11-12, two years older than her, and they are very similar in behaviour and style. The clothes that the big department stores sell for kids are also nowhere near as adult as the UK. Why does the UK market want to turn kids into adults so quickly? We end up with these difficult to manage "kidults" whose expectations and dreams do not involve family orientated pastimes, just self centred and slightly selfish attitudes. I can't remember when this change happened, but it is crystal clear the difference, and if we are a nation that copies much of the US culture, good and more often than not bad, this would be a good one to latch on to, but I think it will be a long time coming!
We got through early Spring, which was generally similar to home, but warmer on the warm days. Yesterday (May 3rd) brought some of our most impressive weather so far. Starting out as rainy, brightened up mid day and then around 4pm we saw the angriest sky, huge rolling clouds, just how we imagined a pre-tornado sky would look. The speed it moved was incredible, low fast thunder clouds with fork lightening and loud thunder to accompany, we thought we heard a siren, which we took to be a weather warning, and the view behind the storm was very restricted by what we took to be rain. As the veil of "rain" got closer we heard an odd noise, and just as it reached around 50 feet away we saw it was hail, mostly the size of large marbles, but as thick as dense snowfall, reducing visibility to no more than feet. As it passed over, the ground was covered like snow and the water from melting hail filled the channels on either side of the road. The noise was tremendous and the house full of children we acquired to avoid the storm became very excited at the whole scene and then, it stopped. As suddenly as it had arrived, the storm roared away to the East and for the rest of the day the ground was sodden and low level thunder growled away in the distance. An awesome natural performance.
We are living in an area that is predominately irrigated desert, so when we do have rain the area gets very green and beautiful. I was recently invited to play golf by a client (it's a tough life!) and the course we played was at the bottom of "our" canyon (what do you mean you haven't got a canyon? really? what a shame!), next to the Snake river. As we waited for a fellow golfer to arrive I was looking at the surrounding flora and fauna and thinking how colour full and attractive it was, as I did so a small deer just walked slowly through the bushes behind the 9th tee, lovely moment and what a great afternoon.
One issue of great concern was the US sense of humour. The people I have spoken with, when the subject of humour comes up, my heart sinks every time as the name Benny Hill rears his (ugly, sexist, unfunny, slapstick, not clever or intricate, smack in the face, crap comedy) head. They lap him up here and it is very very depressing. There are very few people who seem to get irony, sarcasm and wit as perfectly fair forms of fun, which leaves me in a difficult situation, as that what makes me laugh. However, on perusing the Internet a few days back I came across the article below, allegedly written by someone who had been co-opted on to a judging panel for a Chili cook off competition, which is not an unusual event in this competitive society. No matter that it is made up or genuine it made me laugh, and restored my faith that Mr Hill is not the only kind of thing that makes people laugh. Enjoy, and I promise I will write some more and more regularly in future.
Chili Cook Off:
This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in Texas. Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better.
For those of you who have lived in Texas , you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park.
Judge #3 was an inexperienced chili taster named Frank, who was visiting from Springfield, IL.
Frank: 'Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted"
Here are the scorecard notes from the event:
CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.
Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN 'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.
Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI
Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.
Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.
Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano (bleach!). Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting sh*t-faced from all of the beer.
CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC
Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the beer maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. This 300 lb. Woman is starting to look HOT ... Just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?
CHILI # 5 - LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER
Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.
Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted, and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really ticks me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw them.
CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY
Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.
Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, garlic. Superb.
Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.
CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI
Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am worried about judge number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
Judge #3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing. It's too painful. Screw it, I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI
Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted, passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor feller, wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?
Judge # 3 -- No Report
Well I thought it was funny!!
Monday, 4 May 2009
Wednesday, 21 January 2009
Sorry for the delay, normal service is now resumed!
So, here we are, all of us settled in to our cosy hotel room and thinking "oh my god what have we done!"
It has been, without a doubt, a week of highs and lows, with the latter outperforming the former by quite a way.
Leaving Ellesmere early on Sunday morning with pretty well all our clothes in 11 suitcases was a massive wrench. We kept smiling for the kids sake and despite having little or no sleep got to Manchester and checked our luggage with no real problems, plane was delayed 50 minutes but we got on and had a great flight across, slept for much of it, and landed with hardly a bump in a snowy Chicago. We were still in good time UNTIL Lorraine's Visa was questioned and after having an interview with the "nice" people in immigration we were told that she was only allowed 12 months in the USA, which was a blow as the kids and I had three years on ours. We got through in the end and made the gate for our next flight, just in time to miss it. So, back to the "nice" man on the United Airlines desk to change our tickets for a later flight, nearly three hours later, but not downhearted we had a Big Mac and a doze before our next flight, not many highs yet!
Chicago to Denver was pretty uneventful, one amusing element was we were in a row of 5 seats, the fifth seat taken up by a man who obviously took care of his appearance. This however was not really helped by Sam's (grubby trainer clad) feet and legs being draped across him for the whole 3 hours. he was very good about it, but as Lorraine and I were both drifting in and out of sleep mode we didn't care, terrible parents we are!
So we are now in Denver, our last flight is delayed until mid-night, we are so tired we fall asleep in the walkway by the departure gate. We finally arrive in Boise Idaho at 2 a.m. and then drove to Twin Falls, falling in to bed in the aforementioned hotel at 5.30 a.m. So in all we had left the UK at 11pm US time Saturday, and got to be at 5.30 a.m. Monday, so highs are still limited.
Tuesday I bravely went to work around 11, had the attention span of a retarded goldfish, so quit and went to eat later with some colleagues for a catch up. Kids were so impressed they fell asleep at the table!! Nope, no highs yet.
Wednesday, that was a goodish day, started with huge homesickness from some, but ended with finding a lovely house, that we both felt happy with, at the right price, and the builder was desperate to sell, what a result. Then to really top it they said we could move in a week on Friday (23rd Jan) how quick is that? A high end to the day. Mini niggle, the kids went swimming in the hotel pool and the chlorine was a tad overdone, two very red faced children, it would have been funny if it hadn't been our kids!
Spent the next couple of days mixing work and domestic stuff, with two forward and one back and some huge frustrations. The distance is one thing, the culture is quite another. We have been telling people we hoped to move into our house within a fortnight, they smile and nod and say that's nice, the only thing is, they have no clue what a fortnight is, and are too polite to say! Just not a phrase they use, we are finding quite a few of those on both sides of the language barrier. They are genuinely nice people, never judge a country by it's politicians, with one notable exception (see below).
We eat out every night, I eat steak every night and it is fantastic food, salads are back, weather is bloody freezing, but when the sun shines, which it does regularly, it really is beautiful.
So Tuesday last the kids went to school for the first time, that was an adventure. Harrison Elementary admitted Sam to the second grade and Sarah to the third. Lorraine spent the whole day in school with Sarah who found it quite emotional. Sam just went for it, as he does, and seemed to fit in straight away. Day two today, they coped on their own and that is a massive plus.
Lovely moment at the school on Tuesday. The Presidential Inauguration was being broadcast live. I don't know how it played in the UK, but Obama is an awesome speaker. As I sat at the back of the class and watched as kids of 8 and 9 were clapping at his speech, there were some genuine lump in the throat moments even for the Brits at the back. The media have lapped it up and all he needs to do now is deliver! He is without doubt the most charismatic politician I have seen for years, possibly ever, and I am, as you know, very old.
We miss everyone very much, we struggle to read text messages they keep choking us, but please keep them coming, and the Face book stuff, we will reply eventually, as soon as we get settled we will have loads more time to catch up. We still say we are only here for a short while, we will be home soon, but we will see. Really hoping family and friends can scrape together the money to come and visit. We hope you will, Spring is around the corner with rather pleasing 65-75 degree heat, and then the area really comes alive and I am told is truly beautiful. So, see you soon? I do hope so.
It has been, without a doubt, a week of highs and lows, with the latter outperforming the former by quite a way.
Leaving Ellesmere early on Sunday morning with pretty well all our clothes in 11 suitcases was a massive wrench. We kept smiling for the kids sake and despite having little or no sleep got to Manchester and checked our luggage with no real problems, plane was delayed 50 minutes but we got on and had a great flight across, slept for much of it, and landed with hardly a bump in a snowy Chicago. We were still in good time UNTIL Lorraine's Visa was questioned and after having an interview with the "nice" people in immigration we were told that she was only allowed 12 months in the USA, which was a blow as the kids and I had three years on ours. We got through in the end and made the gate for our next flight, just in time to miss it. So, back to the "nice" man on the United Airlines desk to change our tickets for a later flight, nearly three hours later, but not downhearted we had a Big Mac and a doze before our next flight, not many highs yet!
Chicago to Denver was pretty uneventful, one amusing element was we were in a row of 5 seats, the fifth seat taken up by a man who obviously took care of his appearance. This however was not really helped by Sam's (grubby trainer clad) feet and legs being draped across him for the whole 3 hours. he was very good about it, but as Lorraine and I were both drifting in and out of sleep mode we didn't care, terrible parents we are!
So we are now in Denver, our last flight is delayed until mid-night, we are so tired we fall asleep in the walkway by the departure gate. We finally arrive in Boise Idaho at 2 a.m. and then drove to Twin Falls, falling in to bed in the aforementioned hotel at 5.30 a.m. So in all we had left the UK at 11pm US time Saturday, and got to be at 5.30 a.m. Monday, so highs are still limited.
Tuesday I bravely went to work around 11, had the attention span of a retarded goldfish, so quit and went to eat later with some colleagues for a catch up. Kids were so impressed they fell asleep at the table!! Nope, no highs yet.
Wednesday, that was a goodish day, started with huge homesickness from some, but ended with finding a lovely house, that we both felt happy with, at the right price, and the builder was desperate to sell, what a result. Then to really top it they said we could move in a week on Friday (23rd Jan) how quick is that? A high end to the day. Mini niggle, the kids went swimming in the hotel pool and the chlorine was a tad overdone, two very red faced children, it would have been funny if it hadn't been our kids!
Spent the next couple of days mixing work and domestic stuff, with two forward and one back and some huge frustrations. The distance is one thing, the culture is quite another. We have been telling people we hoped to move into our house within a fortnight, they smile and nod and say that's nice, the only thing is, they have no clue what a fortnight is, and are too polite to say! Just not a phrase they use, we are finding quite a few of those on both sides of the language barrier. They are genuinely nice people, never judge a country by it's politicians, with one notable exception (see below).
We eat out every night, I eat steak every night and it is fantastic food, salads are back, weather is bloody freezing, but when the sun shines, which it does regularly, it really is beautiful.
So Tuesday last the kids went to school for the first time, that was an adventure. Harrison Elementary admitted Sam to the second grade and Sarah to the third. Lorraine spent the whole day in school with Sarah who found it quite emotional. Sam just went for it, as he does, and seemed to fit in straight away. Day two today, they coped on their own and that is a massive plus.
Lovely moment at the school on Tuesday. The Presidential Inauguration was being broadcast live. I don't know how it played in the UK, but Obama is an awesome speaker. As I sat at the back of the class and watched as kids of 8 and 9 were clapping at his speech, there were some genuine lump in the throat moments even for the Brits at the back. The media have lapped it up and all he needs to do now is deliver! He is without doubt the most charismatic politician I have seen for years, possibly ever, and I am, as you know, very old.
We miss everyone very much, we struggle to read text messages they keep choking us, but please keep them coming, and the Face book stuff, we will reply eventually, as soon as we get settled we will have loads more time to catch up. We still say we are only here for a short while, we will be home soon, but we will see. Really hoping family and friends can scrape together the money to come and visit. We hope you will, Spring is around the corner with rather pleasing 65-75 degree heat, and then the area really comes alive and I am told is truly beautiful. So, see you soon? I do hope so.
Wednesday, 19 November 2008
Sport Jim but not as we know it
Imagine, if you can, the commentator of a sports programme saying something along the lines of " what an incredible performance, this guy is really on top of his game right now, he could be the best there is." To me, and you I should think, that would conj our up a vision of health and fitness, toned and muscular possibly a vision of a really well developed young man, or me, now I am in the gym every night!
Imagine my surprise when I turned to see this vision of health and fitness and was greeted by a fat slob, with a beard that had never seen any grooming, ripped jeans, lumberjack shirt, straining to get out of a welded shut car door window.
The"World Championship" he had just won was a kind of demolition car race. The main skill required was to weld stuff to your car and avoid getting hammered by your rivals. Ah but this would be a unique niche sport I hear you say, but no, this is on Sky Sports 1 (or ESPN the US equivalent) and it was repeated over two or three nights, just in case you missed it!
Gladiators, the UK entertainment show, is bordering on being a serious sport with analysis and all sorts of helpful insights into the whole process. Gladiators!!!
If you accept the three main sports, Baseball, Basketball and American Football or "Rugby for girls" as as I jokingly called it and was verbally lynched, are just that, sports, there is also some real bizarre stuff going on.
Looking at the schedule there is the quite thrilling "sports" programme that is basically a car auction, very nice cars to be fair, but an auction. Just to make the point it is on for HOURS, and I, naively thinking this was an annual event, was very surprised when I was asked to tune in next week to see it again. It's not just the actual programmes, the ubiquitous adverts as well have to be included every couple of minutes, and the endless analysis, on and on and on, it's drivel.
Also, we should not ignore world championship Bass fishing, and every morning there is a sports programme on how to kill stuff, this morning it was bears. The gopher shooting was hysterical if you ignore the cruelty element of shooting the equivalent of your pet hamster. I am not joking the list is endless.
Then there is wrestling. I am almost ashamed to admit that my son is a big fan, I can use the excuse he is young and I can beat it out of him (joke), but loads of people here think it is:
a) real
b) a sport, and even more puzzling
c) not fixed!
I could weep, if being gullible were a sport these folks would be world champions like our overweight car driver. When you consider the list of world titles the US lay claim to it is generally because no one else takes part. They just seem to make up stuff to do and make themselves world champs. The areas where they do compete on a world stage in team sports, like "soccer," they are ranked a tad above Trinidad and Tobago and are quite frankly, crap.
Imagine my surprise when I turned to see this vision of health and fitness and was greeted by a fat slob, with a beard that had never seen any grooming, ripped jeans, lumberjack shirt, straining to get out of a welded shut car door window.
The"World Championship" he had just won was a kind of demolition car race. The main skill required was to weld stuff to your car and avoid getting hammered by your rivals. Ah but this would be a unique niche sport I hear you say, but no, this is on Sky Sports 1 (or ESPN the US equivalent) and it was repeated over two or three nights, just in case you missed it!
Gladiators, the UK entertainment show, is bordering on being a serious sport with analysis and all sorts of helpful insights into the whole process. Gladiators!!!
If you accept the three main sports, Baseball, Basketball and American Football or "Rugby for girls" as as I jokingly called it and was verbally lynched, are just that, sports, there is also some real bizarre stuff going on.
Looking at the schedule there is the quite thrilling "sports" programme that is basically a car auction, very nice cars to be fair, but an auction. Just to make the point it is on for HOURS, and I, naively thinking this was an annual event, was very surprised when I was asked to tune in next week to see it again. It's not just the actual programmes, the ubiquitous adverts as well have to be included every couple of minutes, and the endless analysis, on and on and on, it's drivel.
Also, we should not ignore world championship Bass fishing, and every morning there is a sports programme on how to kill stuff, this morning it was bears. The gopher shooting was hysterical if you ignore the cruelty element of shooting the equivalent of your pet hamster. I am not joking the list is endless.
Then there is wrestling. I am almost ashamed to admit that my son is a big fan, I can use the excuse he is young and I can beat it out of him (joke), but loads of people here think it is:
a) real
b) a sport, and even more puzzling
c) not fixed!
I could weep, if being gullible were a sport these folks would be world champions like our overweight car driver. When you consider the list of world titles the US lay claim to it is generally because no one else takes part. They just seem to make up stuff to do and make themselves world champs. The areas where they do compete on a world stage in team sports, like "soccer," they are ranked a tad above Trinidad and Tobago and are quite frankly, crap.
Friday, 14 November 2008
Cars and Cuisine
End of week two, generally pretty good, a few surprises but all in all pretty good. I met the manager of our biggest customer, expected it to be really challenging, turned out it was enjoyable, positive and nowhere near as difficult as I first thought. Met up with a "loyal" member of staff and it was crap, but those situations can be the same the world over.
I got a car today, when I say car I mean truck, when I say truck I mean a great big hulking Ford 150 that is the size of a small bedsit you could pay considerable cash for in inner London.
While, as I have made clear, I quite like the American way of life in general, I do however really struggle with this one. It's just massive, it's slow, comber some and stops well within a mile of when you first apply the brakes! I am obviously in a minority of one because EVERYONE has one. This is the standard issue vehicle for our company, and the one I have is going on to a more deserving home shortly when my permanent, and slightly less enormous, chariot arrives. The intended owner arrived today to have a look at his new truck (I hope I don't scratch it before he gets it!) he had his wife with him, and they were just soooo in love with the new beast, don't get it, never will, but on the plus side it does do almost 14 miles to the gallon!!!
I have just had my tea in my very nice hotel room. I have had a superbly cooked sirloin, with mushrooms and a jacket potato with just loads of stuff on it, butter, cream, bacon bits, you name it this potato had it, that would be no surprise to anyone who knows me. What may surprise some folks is the starter, I enjoyed it almost as much, which is unusual as it was a salad! I do not mean the lacklustre wish washy salads of the UK this was an enormous salad with everything you have ever seen in a salad with it, apart from pasta as that would constitute a different meal entirely. Still not convinced? Well nor was I until you add the dressing, again not the coloured water of my home, but thick cheese sauce, thousand island with lumps, honey and mustard with real bees ( well almost) they are gorgeous. I have eaten at least one salad every day since I have been here, considering my "5 a day" at home was more like 5 a week this is a huge change, like the gym, this US lifestyle might be good for me! I was reliably informed by some dear friends that I would be the size of a house upon my return, and with an overwhelming choice of food outlets that could have been the case.
There is a two tier food outlet system here and the upper end will keep you in fine fettle, steak houses, pasta, fresh fish, Thai food, Sushi and this is the restaraunt within a five minute walk of the hotel, all serving the marvellous salads. However, beware the familiar. I think I mentioned I was a little unwell not long after my arrival? Well as I felt a little better I really fancied some chicken, not just any chicken, but some KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN with FRIES and an unfeasibly large COKE. I had been thinking for hours of this meal. Hours and hours, and eventually I dragged my poorly butt out of bed, washed, dressed and feebly but determinedly set off for the good ol KFC. I walked in to the luxury surroundings of the Twin Falls KFC and imagine my delight when I saw many free tables, apart from what looked like a married couple, one of whom (him) was massive, she was a little less large, but unfortunately had an oxygen tank and one of those tube under the nose jobs, not the best advert for the fare available.
Undeterred I walked manfully up to the counter, ordered a KFC chicken breast meal, no bones and very nice in KFC Shrewsbury, Shropshire. The 10 year old girl serving, obviously felt sorry for my ill health, and offered to bring my meal across. She then handed me an enormous Coke cup, free refills, like anyone could drink two, and off I hobbled with the first part of my days desires fulfilled.
As I sat watching the healthy couple in the corner my meal arrived, it had chicken without doubt, but no fries, instead there was a large dollop of mash potato, and the side serving that in the UK would be a small serving of baked beans or sweetcorn etc was around half a pound of cold slaw which was disappointing, but nowhere near as disappointing as the whole thing being covered in gravy, thick really horrible gravy. My enjoyment knew no beginning!! It was only around £4 so one shouldn't really complain.
Until you consider the afore mentioned meal. I had a great salad with blue cheese dressing, a superb 8oz (cooked) Sirloin, with fried mushrooms and the fully covered baked potato. Also included were some cake things which I couldn't manage. This was delivered to my door, with delivery and a service charge included, for..................................... ..... £11.75!!!! It's not worth eating at the crappy places, it really isn't!
I got a car today, when I say car I mean truck, when I say truck I mean a great big hulking Ford 150 that is the size of a small bedsit you could pay considerable cash for in inner London.
While, as I have made clear, I quite like the American way of life in general, I do however really struggle with this one. It's just massive, it's slow, comber some and stops well within a mile of when you first apply the brakes! I am obviously in a minority of one because EVERYONE has one. This is the standard issue vehicle for our company, and the one I have is going on to a more deserving home shortly when my permanent, and slightly less enormous, chariot arrives. The intended owner arrived today to have a look at his new truck (I hope I don't scratch it before he gets it!) he had his wife with him, and they were just soooo in love with the new beast, don't get it, never will, but on the plus side it does do almost 14 miles to the gallon!!!
I have just had my tea in my very nice hotel room. I have had a superbly cooked sirloin, with mushrooms and a jacket potato with just loads of stuff on it, butter, cream, bacon bits, you name it this potato had it, that would be no surprise to anyone who knows me. What may surprise some folks is the starter, I enjoyed it almost as much, which is unusual as it was a salad! I do not mean the lacklustre wish washy salads of the UK this was an enormous salad with everything you have ever seen in a salad with it, apart from pasta as that would constitute a different meal entirely. Still not convinced? Well nor was I until you add the dressing, again not the coloured water of my home, but thick cheese sauce, thousand island with lumps, honey and mustard with real bees ( well almost) they are gorgeous. I have eaten at least one salad every day since I have been here, considering my "5 a day" at home was more like 5 a week this is a huge change, like the gym, this US lifestyle might be good for me! I was reliably informed by some dear friends that I would be the size of a house upon my return, and with an overwhelming choice of food outlets that could have been the case.
There is a two tier food outlet system here and the upper end will keep you in fine fettle, steak houses, pasta, fresh fish, Thai food, Sushi and this is the restaraunt within a five minute walk of the hotel, all serving the marvellous salads. However, beware the familiar. I think I mentioned I was a little unwell not long after my arrival? Well as I felt a little better I really fancied some chicken, not just any chicken, but some KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN with FRIES and an unfeasibly large COKE. I had been thinking for hours of this meal. Hours and hours, and eventually I dragged my poorly butt out of bed, washed, dressed and feebly but determinedly set off for the good ol KFC. I walked in to the luxury surroundings of the Twin Falls KFC and imagine my delight when I saw many free tables, apart from what looked like a married couple, one of whom (him) was massive, she was a little less large, but unfortunately had an oxygen tank and one of those tube under the nose jobs, not the best advert for the fare available.
Undeterred I walked manfully up to the counter, ordered a KFC chicken breast meal, no bones and very nice in KFC Shrewsbury, Shropshire. The 10 year old girl serving, obviously felt sorry for my ill health, and offered to bring my meal across. She then handed me an enormous Coke cup, free refills, like anyone could drink two, and off I hobbled with the first part of my days desires fulfilled.
As I sat watching the healthy couple in the corner my meal arrived, it had chicken without doubt, but no fries, instead there was a large dollop of mash potato, and the side serving that in the UK would be a small serving of baked beans or sweetcorn etc was around half a pound of cold slaw which was disappointing, but nowhere near as disappointing as the whole thing being covered in gravy, thick really horrible gravy. My enjoyment knew no beginning!! It was only around £4 so one shouldn't really complain.
Until you consider the afore mentioned meal. I had a great salad with blue cheese dressing, a superb 8oz (cooked) Sirloin, with fried mushrooms and the fully covered baked potato. Also included were some cake things which I couldn't manage. This was delivered to my door, with delivery and a service charge included, for..................................... ..... £11.75!!!! It's not worth eating at the crappy places, it really isn't!
Tuesday, 11 November 2008
Family Sunday and Gym time
Well, week two and all is well. I have appointments booked with key staff and key customers. All very exciting. It has to be said the whole structure here is looking a mess. It has not been made that way but has evolved over the years, my mission, and I have chosen to accept it, is to sort it out !
Had an invite to a colleagues house on Sunday and spent the afternoon with Joe, his wife and kids. It was very very pleasant and we spent the time discussing everything from politics to culture to religion. I do love a good discussion, always have, but I have learned in the US that all of these subject matters are very dangerous ground! One thing that the folks in the US have EVERY time is a belief in their country/politics/President. It's interesting that now the election is over the view is the country must support the new President and support the new regime. I think from our UK perspective this could be perceived as arrogant, but the more I see it, the more I think I like it, and if we had a culture built around national pride and civic responsibility many of the "youth culture" problems of today may not be quite as prevalent. If it goes too far you can have the National Front scenario, or it's US equivalent, but from a general view I think on the whole its good. Joe and his family are part of the large Mormon community in the area and are thoroughly decent pleasant people, I got a great understanding of the basis of their beliefs and have to say it was highly interesting, however as things stand it is unlikely I will change my current stance of strong disbelief!!
I rang home today, as is my want, and after the domestic discussions with my better half I had a chat with the kids, it is a little bit lump in the throat sometimes, but today they laughed, they laughed very much. Why ? I happened to mention that as I spend evenings alone and with nothing to do I was going to the gym, and when I came home I would be thin and fit. They thought the fact that I would be healthy was the funniest thing ever, they laughed like adults that have heard a really funny joke, little sods! My darling boy said he would miss being able to rest on my fat tummy!! Just as I was feeling a little miffed at their lack of faith in me, my still darling boy asked if I new what mummy had been doing since I left, suspecting a little gossip I said no, he then said "she's done no washing, she's done no cleaning or cooking" so I just had to ask, "all she has done is smoke cigarettes and play Zelda on the PlayStation" now that is why sometimes, just sometimes, kids can brighten your entire week let alone your day, my turn to laugh !!!!
Had an invite to a colleagues house on Sunday and spent the afternoon with Joe, his wife and kids. It was very very pleasant and we spent the time discussing everything from politics to culture to religion. I do love a good discussion, always have, but I have learned in the US that all of these subject matters are very dangerous ground! One thing that the folks in the US have EVERY time is a belief in their country/politics/President. It's interesting that now the election is over the view is the country must support the new President and support the new regime. I think from our UK perspective this could be perceived as arrogant, but the more I see it, the more I think I like it, and if we had a culture built around national pride and civic responsibility many of the "youth culture" problems of today may not be quite as prevalent. If it goes too far you can have the National Front scenario, or it's US equivalent, but from a general view I think on the whole its good. Joe and his family are part of the large Mormon community in the area and are thoroughly decent pleasant people, I got a great understanding of the basis of their beliefs and have to say it was highly interesting, however as things stand it is unlikely I will change my current stance of strong disbelief!!
I rang home today, as is my want, and after the domestic discussions with my better half I had a chat with the kids, it is a little bit lump in the throat sometimes, but today they laughed, they laughed very much. Why ? I happened to mention that as I spend evenings alone and with nothing to do I was going to the gym, and when I came home I would be thin and fit. They thought the fact that I would be healthy was the funniest thing ever, they laughed like adults that have heard a really funny joke, little sods! My darling boy said he would miss being able to rest on my fat tummy!! Just as I was feeling a little miffed at their lack of faith in me, my still darling boy asked if I new what mummy had been doing since I left, suspecting a little gossip I said no, he then said "she's done no washing, she's done no cleaning or cooking" so I just had to ask, "all she has done is smoke cigarettes and play Zelda on the PlayStation" now that is why sometimes, just sometimes, kids can brighten your entire week let alone your day, my turn to laugh !!!!
Friday, 7 November 2008
Tough Jobs and TV
Well here is Friday, I survived the first week, and my first major job. Which is to sack some poor guy. Cut a long story short his driving record really let him down to the extent that he wouldn't be allowed to drive for us, should have been checked before we took him on, but you live and learn. It went well, or as well as these things can, but was a real eye opener compared to the English model. There is a very different approach to DUI (driving under the influence) here, to the extent that you don't actually lose your license rather than have restrictions applied, very civilised.
I am really enjoying the days, taking a pretty chaotic structure and trying to imagine in the first instance what it should look like, looking at the business from many angles. Next week I need to talk to some of the field guys to get some perspective on their world, and how we can improve it, and then pull it all together in an action plan we can all follow.
Socially it is rubbish, and the amount of sleep I am getting I am sure is very healthy, but soooooo dull. The TV is OK ish, but the adverts, the endless tedious adverts O MY GOD how can that be entertainment? I was fortunate to catch a soccer game this week, that's a lie I caught THE soccer game this week Manchester United v Celtic, and during the half time interval when they were showing the highlights of other games they had 5, yes 5, sets of adverts in a fifteen minute gap between the two halves. Then just to really make the point the content is very very odd. The drug adverts are really funny, in a three minute commercial for a nicotine aversion pill one minute describes the benefits of not smoking, the next two minutes go through the problems you may encounter while taking them, including; suicide, suicidal thoughts, diarrhea, (probably want to kill yourself because of all the diarrhea!) inability to sleep, lucid dreams no dreams, sweating and finally, moods. The closing line of ask your doctor if the pill could help you is almost laugh out loud funny, yes it could help, if you were a paid up member SuicideR Us, have an impacted colon, or perhaps feel you are having to much sleep, I never thought of that, perhaps it could help me, at least with the sleep issue !!! More next week, can't wait.
I am really enjoying the days, taking a pretty chaotic structure and trying to imagine in the first instance what it should look like, looking at the business from many angles. Next week I need to talk to some of the field guys to get some perspective on their world, and how we can improve it, and then pull it all together in an action plan we can all follow.
Socially it is rubbish, and the amount of sleep I am getting I am sure is very healthy, but soooooo dull. The TV is OK ish, but the adverts, the endless tedious adverts O MY GOD how can that be entertainment? I was fortunate to catch a soccer game this week, that's a lie I caught THE soccer game this week Manchester United v Celtic, and during the half time interval when they were showing the highlights of other games they had 5, yes 5, sets of adverts in a fifteen minute gap between the two halves. Then just to really make the point the content is very very odd. The drug adverts are really funny, in a three minute commercial for a nicotine aversion pill one minute describes the benefits of not smoking, the next two minutes go through the problems you may encounter while taking them, including; suicide, suicidal thoughts, diarrhea, (probably want to kill yourself because of all the diarrhea!) inability to sleep, lucid dreams no dreams, sweating and finally, moods. The closing line of ask your doctor if the pill could help you is almost laugh out loud funny, yes it could help, if you were a paid up member SuicideR Us, have an impacted colon, or perhaps feel you are having to much sleep, I never thought of that, perhaps it could help me, at least with the sleep issue !!! More next week, can't wait.
Wednesday, 5 November 2008
Exciting Times
Well I am here and have done my first day at the office, my second day I am ILL!!!!!!!!! How bad does that look ? How much I must be impressing my new colleagues
I begun to have the sniffles on the plane over, and felt ill yesterday evening , and last night was hideous. O well can't be helped, I have stayed away from the office today as the guys will have no immunity to my English cold!
What a great time though to be here, due to the fact I was awake most of the night I watched the US election results, the amount of coverage is huge, which is understandable in any election in any Western democracy, but the emotion here is incredible. Idaho is a Republican state, and the guys I spoke to yesterday regarded Obama as a "socialist" which from a UK perspective is bizzarre, but McCain was OK, which is quite scarey.
I get the feeling that the US media and many many people feel quite pleased with themselves that they have at elected a Black president, it's almost a feeling to say to themselves and the rest of the world "see, we are not racist." I am amazed to see (some) Black commentators saying racism was now defeated, that seems a dangerous assumption.
I have not heard anyone say that the best orator, with a message of change, who could verbally inspire huge crowds and had an extrodainary TV media presence won the election.
Set this against a Republican who came across as more of the same type policies, and an incredibly poor speaker, who could not function without cue cards and hinting at further millitary action everywhere, and whose VP was more than a little suspect. It just so happened that the winner happened to be black.
I get the impression the Republicans will have to rebuild, much the same as the UK Conservative party have had to do, so the US may have to accept that the Democrats may be here for some time. Great to watch from an outsiders view, I hope the comparrisons to Kennedy are from an inspirational view and some nutter does not try to make the whole thing even more comparable.
I begun to have the sniffles on the plane over, and felt ill yesterday evening , and last night was hideous. O well can't be helped, I have stayed away from the office today as the guys will have no immunity to my English cold!
What a great time though to be here, due to the fact I was awake most of the night I watched the US election results, the amount of coverage is huge, which is understandable in any election in any Western democracy, but the emotion here is incredible. Idaho is a Republican state, and the guys I spoke to yesterday regarded Obama as a "socialist" which from a UK perspective is bizzarre, but McCain was OK, which is quite scarey.
I get the feeling that the US media and many many people feel quite pleased with themselves that they have at elected a Black president, it's almost a feeling to say to themselves and the rest of the world "see, we are not racist." I am amazed to see (some) Black commentators saying racism was now defeated, that seems a dangerous assumption.
I have not heard anyone say that the best orator, with a message of change, who could verbally inspire huge crowds and had an extrodainary TV media presence won the election.
Set this against a Republican who came across as more of the same type policies, and an incredibly poor speaker, who could not function without cue cards and hinting at further millitary action everywhere, and whose VP was more than a little suspect. It just so happened that the winner happened to be black.
I get the impression the Republicans will have to rebuild, much the same as the UK Conservative party have had to do, so the US may have to accept that the Democrats may be here for some time. Great to watch from an outsiders view, I hope the comparrisons to Kennedy are from an inspirational view and some nutter does not try to make the whole thing even more comparable.
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